Reading Response #11, comments on Emilie Quilliams’ second draft

Your paper contains a lot of interesting points, both positive and negative about living in the city vs the country. I would add more statistics to back up your information, maybe some statistics about safety? Although children in the city seem to have more independence, that independence could come with a higher risk of being kidnapped. Although you don’t want your paper to be dreary, it is something to consider. As well, it would be interesting to expand on the suburban aspect because they are like a “happy medium” between city and country. I grew up in suburb, and I can say that yes there are similar designs for houses, but there are also huge backyards with pools for kids to play in and large parks for everyone to enjoy. Also, grocery stores and cinemas can be anywhere from 2 minutes from your house to 20. The lack of schools in the country is also an interesting aspect to your paper. You show this as a positive to the country because all of your friends go to the same school but the large amount of schools in the city can also be viewed positively because then children and parents have more choice. Some high schools also focus on specific things, for example the arts or sports so if a child is really interested in that it would be a beneficial and rewarding experience for them to go there. All in all, your paper has some convincing arguments as to why neither the country nor the city are a perfect place to live, but they both have benefits.


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